I'm lying on the office floor with you at 2am. This may be our last night together. You're not doing well the last couple of days and I fear the end of your time on this side of heaven is drawing near. My heart is breaking just a little at a time but I also have some peace knowing that you will feel better soon. We don't want you to suffer, we've always been sure of that, but no one is ready to let you go quite yet. You're an amazing dog and you've been there quietly cheering all of on in every aspect of our lives. You don't ask for anything in return, just some love and some yummy snacks from time to time.
I don't know how any of this is supposed to go. I don't know what to tell the kids, or when. My heart breaks for them in a million more pieces. I can't bear the thought of how awful it will be when I have to tell Kinley that you're not coming back. I can't stand the thought of walking in the house and not seeing you under the table. I can't imagine not having you here.
You have meant so much to me. You have been there through our wedding, our first house, each baby. You were always here. I will miss you so terribly. Your stinky breath and your somewhat annoying panting and even ALL YOUR HAIR. I will miss you licking my face when I'm sad and chasing bunnies in the yard. I will definitely miss seeing you swim which I'm pretty sure was your most favorite thing ever. One thing is certain and that is you will be one of MY most favorite things forever and ever. There will never be another dog as wonderful as you. There will never be another pet who was there for the important milestones that you experienced with us. I love you more than I can convey here. I'll miss you.
Love, Mommy.

No comments:
Post a Comment